
A Very Offensive Rom-Com

A Very Offensive Rom-Com
April 5, 2019
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58m
•
Episode Ranking: 16/100
TOPICS: Human Connection Implicit Bias Racial Stereotypes
Episode Description
Hacking Attraction & Changing Preferences: A woman reevaluates her dating patterns and personal beliefs. She explores whether attraction can be consciously altered. The discussion questions the nature of desire and self-perception.
Ideabrix Summary
The 'A Very Offensive Rom-Com' episode of the 'Invisibilia' podcast explores the complex issue of racial preferences in dating through the personal journey of a woman identified only as L. The episode begins with L's realization that despite her progressive views and advocacy for Asian American women, she has an unconscious bias in her dating life, predominantly being attracted to white men. This revelation is prompted by a Reddit user who challenges her on her racial preferences, leading L to confront the uncomfortable truth that she may have internalized societal racism in her romantic choices.
L's story unfolds as she recounts her history with attraction, initially believing she might be asexual due to her lack of interest in men she dated, until she experiences an overpowering sexual desire for a white man in college. This experience becomes her benchmark for attraction, but the Reddit confrontation forces her to reevaluate her preferences. Determined to change, L embarks on a self-designed 'detox' program to recondition her attractions by exposing herself to media featuring attractive men of color, questioning her attraction to white men, and consciously trying to date non-white men.
The podcast delves into the history of racial preferences, highlighting the systemic racism that has influenced societal standards of attractiveness, particularly the sexualization of Asian women and the emasculation of Asian men in American culture. It also examines the personal stories of individuals like C, an Asian man who internalized racist stereotypes to the extent of aligning with white supremacists before ultimately rejecting those views.
As L proceeds with her experiment, she faces the challenge of translating her newfound awareness into genuine attraction. Despite her efforts, she struggles to find the same intense desire she once felt, leading to a series of lackluster dates and a realization that her approach may have led to another form of objectification, particularly towards black men.
L's story unfolds as she recounts her history with attraction, initially believing she might be asexual due to her lack of interest in men she dated, until she experiences an overpowering sexual desire for a white man in college. This experience becomes her benchmark for attraction, but the Reddit confrontation forces her to reevaluate her preferences. Determined to change, L embarks on a self-designed 'detox' program to recondition her attractions by exposing herself to media featuring attractive men of color, questioning her attraction to white men, and consciously trying to date non-white men.
The podcast delves into the history of racial preferences, highlighting the systemic racism that has influenced societal standards of attractiveness, particularly the sexualization of Asian women and the emasculation of Asian men in American culture. It also examines the personal stories of individuals like C, an Asian man who internalized racist stereotypes to the extent of aligning with white supremacists before ultimately rejecting those views.
As L proceeds with her experiment, she faces the challenge of translating her newfound awareness into genuine attraction. Despite her efforts, she struggles to find the same intense desire she once felt, leading to a series of lackluster dates and a realization that her approach may have led to another form of objectification, particularly towards black men.
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